Loneliness – The Enemy’s Playground

From the early moments in the Garden of Eden, God has said;

Then the LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Genesis 2:18

This month with Valentine’s Day approaching, it can bring a highlighter to loneliness. So I thought it was a good time to talk about this heavy, and not always a talked-about topic.

As I reflect on my own life, I decided to walk away from God in a place of deep loneliness.

All through scripture, I would read about how God was with me and that He would never leave me. If you ever dare to share your heart about your personal loneliness, many times, those scriptures are read off to you.

Loneliness is real. I know many single friends who struggle this time of year and any other holiday if I think about it. Some people have lost spouses or children and are learning to live without them.

Others are socially awkward and have trouble making friends or dealing with depression.

Sometimes I don’t think we like to admit we are lonely. Instead, we go internal and isolate. This is not a healthy option, nor is it how God created us to live.

One of my favorite scriptures is;

But now, thus says the LORD, your Creator, O Jacob,
And He who formed you, O Israel,
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by name; you are Mine!
“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you;
And through the rivers, they will not overflow you.
When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched,
Nor will the flame burn you.
“For I am the LORD your God,
The Holy One of Israel, your Savior; Isaiah 43:1-3a

God’s Word is truth, and we can count on that, but we don’t always feel like these things being said to us are accurate at the moment.

This is when the enemy likes to slither in and ask us, “Did God really say…?”

Just like with Eve, He takes the opportunity in these weak and emotional moments to throw lies and doubt about the truth of God’s Word and distorts the view of God’s heart towards us.

That is what happened to me. I got angry at God for not being with me and giving me what I needed then. I entertained the lie, and then I began to believe it. I told Him so and walked away.

Have any of you found yourself in this place? Do you hear the enemy whispering those words in your ear as you struggle to navigate this lonely season?

Behold, an hour is coming, and has already come, for you to be scattered, each to his own home, and to leave Me alone; and yet I am not alone, because the Father is with Me. John 16:32

Jesus was getting ready to enter the loneliest point in His life, and here He began to prepare His disciples.

For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things as we are, yet without sin. Hebrews 4:14-15

One thing I love about Jesus is that He truly can empathize with us. He knows what it feels like to be alone. He loved us so much that He went through the deepest loneliness He could ever experience for us so that we might not live alone anymore. On that cross, as He carried OUR sin, He was separated from His Father for the only time He ever would be. His disciples had scattered and even denied knowing Him.

When I hit rock bottom, my prodigal moment in the pig pen, I realized a loneliness I had never known. I had thought I was lonely before, but when I found myself pregnant, with no friends in sight, and a heart full of pain, my Savior met me there.

I returned to my Father’s house, and He ran towards me. He embraced me and walked with me through the stormy waters and the heat of the fire, and He has stayed with me all along.

I find it interesting that in Genesis when God made Adam a helper, the Word for helper is the same as the Word for helper when referring to the Holy Spirit.

I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever; that is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you.
“I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. After a little while the world will no longer see Me, but you will see Me; because I live, you will live also. John 14:16-19

God has consistently said it is not suitable for us to be alone, and He has given us a helper. We have the Holy Spirit. When we accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior, we are given our helper, the Holy Spirit. We are never alone, whether we are single or not. Whether we have children or not. Whether we have a bunch of friends or not.

God has also given us the church.

Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful; and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near. Hebrews 10:23-25

God has given us brothers and sisters in Christ, a family.

Sometimes when we feel alone, we isolate ourselves, or we choose to sit at home and watch church from there, but that is not God’s heart for the body of Christ. Here in God’s Word, He encourages us not to give up meeting together, in person and face to face.

That is where we get to know each other, hug, pray, and share in this life together.

We need that. God knew we did, and He lovingly gave us this gift. Yet we squander it many times and wonder why we are so lonely and disconnected from others.

The truth is God has not left us alone. We don’t always SEE Him working or feel His TOUCH the way we want to in life. We don’t always FEEL His presence or HEAR His voice as tangibly and often as we would like or feel we need.

These are challenging moments, and those are the times the enemy prowls around, waiting to pounce and kill, steal, and destroy your faith and the seeds of truth that are planted inside your heart.

I want to leave you with one of the scriptures God has continually been bringing to mind as I live this season.

The LORD is the one who goes ahead of you; He will be with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” Deuteronomy 8:31

God continues to encourage me not to fear or be discouraged. He reminds me of the truth that He is with me and will not fail. His love never fails.

Even though my prodigal years were filled with heartbreak and hardship, my heart was rooted in the truth that God is with me, He is for me, and He is not letting me go. He continues to pursue my heart, and as I seek Him and pursue His, I always find Him. When I struggle and battle in life, He never lets go of my hand and carries me when I need that.

You are not alone! The enemy wants you to believe you are, but that is a lie.

As Valentine’s day rolls around and we see all that is around us on social media and in life, remember that you are loved more fully and deeper than you can imagine. You were created intentionally and with purpose. You are beautiful and worth being loved, no matter your past or scars, and if you need a reminder on a day when the loneliness is creeping in, don’t hesitate to reach out, and I will remind you of this sweet truth.

Heavenly Father, thank You for Your faithful love for us. Help us to stay rooted in the truth that we are not alone; You have given us a helper and a family. We love YOU! Thank You for being our forever Valentine! In Jesus’ Name. Amen.