Who Am I?

There is a movie I used to watch called “The Runaway Bride.” Julia Roberts plays a woman who had been engaged and at the wedding altar three times. As it showed each relationship, you can see how this woman became the other person instead of being herself in the relationship. She liked the same eggs; she enjoyed the same activities and laughed at the same jokes. Then when it came to going through with the wedding, she ran.

She finally met a man she sincerely loved but went through the same patterned behavior with him, and even though she truly loved him and he did everything to prevent it from happening, this woman still ran.

She ran because she did not understand the root of her running.

This movie triggered some deep emotions for me. I related to this woman. I began remembering a time in my life when I became whoever I was around. I ate where they wanted to eat, I did what they wanted to do, and I didn’t have my own personality at all. I just became them.

There were several reasons why this became my pattern in life, but regardless of how I got there, this pattern needed to be broken if I ever was going to be who God had created me to be.

Just like this woman, I did not know who I was. My identity was in the wrong things and the wrong people.

When I look around today, I notice the enemy attacking people’s identities all over the place, inside and outside the church. This struggle communicates to me how important this truth is and how necessary it is to do the work to understand who God has created me to be and who I am in Him.

After this woman ran that last time, she began a process of learning to understand why she ran. She realized she did not know who she was, not even how she liked her eggs.

She took time to get to know herself. She learned her likes and dislikes. She learned her heart. She gained confidence in who she was and no longer tried to be someone else.

I have had to go through a process like this, and I am still going through it, if I am honest. I am learning who God says I am to Him and in Him. He is teaching me how He has made me and is showing me the giftings He has put in me.

Just the other day, I was putting together the Christmas Tree. I was trying to figure out how to do something different in place of garland. I have some friends that are incredibly good at decorating and making things look much more put together than me. I was struggling with how to do this. I came up with the idea that might go with our rustic and warm setting. I went back and forth about it. The perfect pictures of what I thought it should look like flashed in my head, and I heard God, through the prompting of the Holy Spirit, direct me to ask myself the question, “Who am I?” and was this me? Was I trying to be someone else, or was I allowing myself to be who God made me be in this situation?

The hard part is there are voices all around us; the enemy will use anyone to speak lies to us about us. All He wants is to discourage and destroy us.

When we don’t know who we are and our identity, we become people-pleasers to the max.

We begin to look, act, and think like those around us. We try to be carbon copies of those we look up to or celebrities we celebrate.

We allow this world to define us instead of the God who created us.

This is not what God wants for us. Jesus came so we could live free. Free to have a personal relationship with the Father through Him. Free to live as children of God, who are made in the image of God for His purposes and plans for us.

The enemy doesn’t want this to happen. He wants us to live in bondage and chains, so others won’t know that God is who He says He is and that Jesus is truly Lord and Savior.

Over the next few weeks, we will dig into God’s Word and talk about our identity. We are going to look into the truth of God’s Word, and it will set us free from the lies the enemy has poured into us for so long.

This week I would like to ask ourselves three questions:

  1. Are there things about that woman in the movie I can see in me?
  2. Am I always trying to be like someone else or live up to what someone else thinks I should be?
  3. Do I really know who I am? Why or why not?

I am going to go through this with you. I have a journal to break out and write in as I ponder these questions. God is taking us deep. Deep into our hearts and deep into His.

Are you with me?

Father, we lay our hearts down at your feet. Examine them and reveal them to us. Expose the lies we have believed and renew our minds with Your truth. Help us be honest with ourselves and You as we dig deep together. We want to know Your truth. We want to live free in who you have made us be. We love You. In Jesus Name! Amen!